I just wanted to write a quick blog post and let you all know that although I do a lot of beauty reviews (most requested by readers), my vision for my blog has always been to talk about whatever is going on in my life and what I love and share it with the world. And the most important thing in my life, and my husband's, has been trying to get pregnant. So going forward, I do plan on journaling our journey to making that dream come true. I hope I do not lose any followers by doing so and in fact hope I gain some. 1 in every 10 couples have problems conceiving and I wish more people talked about it. It took me a while to confide in people about the issues I was having and once I did it helped so much. But support groups an forums can only do so much. And while I know I have people in my circle, being able to write my feelings and my pain as raw as it can be sometimes helps, it has always helped.
The reason this is starting now is because my employer provided insurance plan (BCBS of Florida) never covered fertility treatment, only diagnostic. And last year my gyne said that we would be a great candidate for IVF (In Vitro Fertilization). We just found a plan through BCBS of Illinois that will cover fertility treatment (after meeting our large deductible) and will be starting the process in January. Thank god for state mandated coverage.
Let me back up, I was diagnosed with endometriosis before I was 20. I was not worried about ever having children until I was married, so just went through the motions. To date, I have had 5 surgeries for cysts, etc.....which has left me with a lot of scar tissue and I still have those cysts in my uterus. Those things have been making conception quite difficult. I have been with my husband for about 9 years and we have been TTC for over 3. Trying to conceive for over a year with no luck, gives you the medical diagnosis of infertility. We go for our consult with Chicago IVF on December 9th and I am so anxious to get this started. Although we have had all necessary testing done with my gyne, we will do them all over again so they are all up to date. Then when all the results come back, we will meet with the doctor for a treatment plan.
On average, one round of IVF can cost $12,000 before medication and that can cost up to $5,000. Why don't we adopt?? Adoption can cost $10,000 to $25,000. Without insurance, we never would have been able to even try. And this plan will only cover 4 rounds annually. This is a huge investment, both financially and emotionally but it may be our only shot at ever having a child. The good news is that at age 35, there is a 50% chance of pregnancy.
I am more nervous then I have ever been in my life. I am scared of more failure and I am scared of success. I am afraid of getting my hopes up and being excited and I am afraid of being too pessimistic. I am a whirlwind of emotions and have been for the past 3 years. It is an all consuming desire to become a mother and give my husband a child and my mother a grandchild. It is always on my mind from the minute I wake up until I go to bed. I yearn for what I was created to do and it is utterly taking every ounce of strength that I have to fight so hard for it. But I will do whatever it takes, we will do whatever it takes. And I hope that you follow us on this journey, get some information, provide insight and suggestions when you can and enjoy my ramblings.
Thank you and have a great day!! xo
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